I mentioned a threesome to my boyfriend…

I mentioned a threesome to my boyfriend, and he told me he didn’t know if he wants to, but that experimenting with a threesome could be interesting. I feel so bad about bringing it up because if you truly love someone, you don’t want to share them. I feel so insecure in this relationship, and I don’t know what to do!

Okay, first of all, why would you bring up the concept of a threesome if it was not something you wanted to experience? It comes across as if you are testing your boyfriend or as if you are playing games. Again, it seems as if the threesome was not even a topic of discussion, so why would you bring it up? It is never a good sign in a relationship when half of the pairing begins to test the other. It honestly seems as if you and your boyfriend are on two different wavelengths, but also that you are a little insecure regarding the relationship and your worth.

But I am still stuck on the concept of you bringing the threesome up as a topic of discussion when it was not even on the table. My thinking is that you don’t think you are enough for your boyfriend, so you wanted to see if he would be open to a threesome, which would show you that you weren’t enough for him. Does that sound about right? And you say you feel bad about basically testing your boyfriend and for him coming up short of your expectations. Once again, it is never a good idea to play games when it comes to relationships or love. And when you begin to play games in a relationship, that is usually the beginning of the end.

And you are 100% right, you do come across as insecure or lacking high self-esteem. And that is okay because you can always build up your self-esteem and your self-confidence. But do you think that this current relationship is enhancing your happiness and your life? I only ask because it seems that this relationship or any kind of relationship with a significant other, at this time in your life, may not be such a great idea. You could choose to focus on self-love, growing and evolving into the woman you’ve always wanted to be, which will help you figure out what you want from a relationship and a significant other.

And it’s very telling that you feel insecure in the relationship, but you’re not doing anything about it! Why aren’t you? Why are you choosing to stay in a situation, let alone a relationship, that does not make you happy? You have to know your worth and be confident in who you are because I know that if you were more confident and had higher self-esteem, you would have been gone a long time ago. You have to live your life for you, but it honestly seems as if you are not living at all. It actually seems as if you are dying, a slow death that you keep experiencing over and over and over again because you are afraid to be on your own. You would rather wake up every day attached to someone that does not make you happy, instead of waking up to a tomorrow where you are in charge of your happiness and are secure in who you are. Figure out whose happiness is most important to you, yours or your boyfriend and that will lead you down the path that is right for you.

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